The Most Offensive Tourist Traits

This is a very serious conversation. Pay attention.

When touring another country, state or city, it's proper etiquette to play by that destination's culture, rules and regulations. Yes, that means try and learn a few essential pieces of the language, read up on tipping manners, buy a map before you go, and above all, have a plan. I fully support the person who wants to backpack through Europe and explore the scenery -- but even that person has a plan. Pack one. It will be useful.

It's also a good idea to know the basic "vibe" of the place you're visiting. For example:

Savannah, GA, is a lovely little Southern town that is full of charm and charisma. The people are nice (some are a little strange) and everywhere you go in Savannah you'll be greeted with a smile.

In Tangier, Morocco, tourists are fresh bait. This is a poor country that thrives off the tourist dollar. It's to be expected that street peddlers and beggars will approach you. Please be kind - it's their way of life. You're a visitor - adjust.

If you're from the south and you're planning a vacation to the east coast, be prepared for a quick shift in pace. Cities like New York and Boston are fast, fast, fast and if you don't keep up you'll get lost in the crowd.

Today I was walking in the beautiful 80 degree weather to exchange some articles of clothing at lunch before heading back to the white walls of the office. On my way back to the office, I encountered many tourists. Most of whom, I believe, had no idea what city they were even in let alone what to do now that they're here. About an hour ago, my friend Heather called to tell me about a tourist group she was stuck behind -- they were all wearing animal balloon hats. That's so unfortunate. But it got me thinking - maybe it would be valuable to put together a list of the most offensive things tourists do so that readers can avoid doing these things on their next trip.

Here we go:

• Do not wear animal balloon hats. It's embarrassing. You look like a fool. And no one who lives in the area thinks you're cool.
• If you have a map of the area you're visiting, please review it before leaving the hotel. Standing on a street corner staring at a huge map is slightly distracting. Especially for the cab driver who is barreling down the street and can't see around the corner because your big map is blocking his view.
• Walk with the crowd, not against the crowd. If everyone is walking clockwise, it's safe to assume there is a good reason for this.
  
• When following the crowd, please do not stop dead in your tracks and have a debate with your travel buddy about who is the most famous person buried in the graveyard you're about to visit. The other people on the sidewalk likely have somewhere to be. If you're in a tougher city, like New York City, Boston, Washington, DC, etc., residents will have no problem walking right over you. Should that happen, it's your own fault for stopping. I warned you.
• When traveling to a foreign country where a language other than your first language is spoken, please be patient. Once the person you're trying to communicate with realizes that you're a tourist, they will likely slow down and help you. However, that does not mean you should slow down and speak in long syllables. "Wah-air is the baaath-roooom" is better understand when it's said properly. Rule of thumb: Better to make yourself out to look like a fool rather than the person you're requesting help from. You don't want to piss off a native of the area -- you don't know where you'll wind up.
• There is no excuse for couples to wear matching outfits when on vacation. Ever.
• If you're in a fast-paced city, pick up the pace! And vice-versa. If you're used to a fast-paced lifestyle and you're heading down south or to the Caribbean, relax...you'll have a better time and less people will try to offer you drugs to keep you calm.

That's it for now. I'm sure I'll encounter more tourist faux-paus on my walk home tonight. Let me know what I've missed and remember... if you're heading somewhere new, plan ahead!

Happy Travels