Monday, October 6, 2008

The Fine Art of Meditation

Today I had my first session with my "meditation counselor." This is a fancy word for "stress therapist", I think, but I'm going with it - I believe you can be whatever you want on your business card, as long as you prove successful in what the business card says. 

Why am I going? Well, those who read my blog regularly know that stress has slowly crept its way into my world over the years and all of a sudden BAM! -- it exploded. I've always been able to manage stress well and I'm a master at the art of multi-tasking, but what I didn't expect was the unfortunate incident last week:

I was at the airport, waiting to board a plane to Fort Myers and all of sudden it hit me. Panic. I've never been afraid to fly, but all of a sudden things went blurry, I couldn't catch my breath, I was dizzy and feeling sick to my stomach, and then I burst into tears in the airport outside gate C31 at Logan International Airport. Why? How? What? I found a quiet corner, counted to 100 and calmed myself down enough to get on a plane. The flight was fine. I was fine. But what the hell was that?

My doctor suggested I had a panic attack and I said, "That's ridiculous. I've never had a panic attack before and I don't think I'm any more stressed than anyone else." That very well may be, but my body seemed to reject the stress-of-the-day last Saturday and the result was 10-minutes of sheer terror and inner-chaos. I agreed to see a "meditation counselor" and learn how to the uncontrollable.

She was pleasant, easy to talk to, and said two important things to me:

1. You seem very grounded and have a firm grasp on reality.
2. You do not need to take the elevator, the stairs are open during my office hours.

We are meeting next week to practice breathing exercises. In the meantime, my homework assignment is to come up with my "happy place." 

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